Tormented
Good Morning,
Many people constantly blame others for their internal struggles, their inability to function, and other similar issues. Having never served in the military or faced the trauma of some, I cannot say what should or should not be going on in my heart. After nearly fifty years of reading my Bible and working with people, I have learned a few clear facts.
Though it is unpopular, here is a fact: Many people are struggling and have no one to blame but themselves. Before I explain, let us look at the Scripture:
Matthew 18:33 “Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?”
vs. 34 “And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him.”
vs. 35 “So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.”
The king had forgiven a man who was deeply in debt. That forgiven man then failed to forgive a co-worker who had some small debt owed him. The focal point in this passage is the word tormentors in verse 34. This man was to go on in life “tormented,” NOT because of something done to him, but because he failed to forgive.
I know people who illustrate this truth, but I am thinking of one of whom I dearly loved. We spent much time together, both socially and in ministry. On many occasions, this man had hurt his wife. She (at least from the outside) was a great lady and did her part in life. When the marriage ended, the man forgave, apologized, and continued with his life. She carried anger, bitterness, and unforgiveness. He went on to serve in a church in another city, he remarried, and lives a happy life. The wife seemed to never get back on track; she is out of church, out of touch, and hurting still. I believe much was due to her lack of forgiveness.
Forgiveness is not based on how deeply the wound is felt, it is based on how deeply we have offended a righteous God. We are to forgive as God forgave us.
Ephesians 4:32 “And be ye kind one to another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”
There are certainly biblical ways to find victory over a bitter and unforgiving heart. The most basic principle is to understand that however deeply we have been wounded, Jesus was wounded more because of our sin. No matter how much someone offended us, we have offended a holy God infinitely more. If God can forgive me and you, then God expects us to forgive others.
The tormentors are created by ourselves. God makes it clear that both the offended and offender can find peace and purpose, but God also promises that HE will deliver the unforgiving person to tormentors.
Forgiveness is powerful, vital, a divine mandate, and simply key in taking good care of ourselves. Somewhere, I read, “To forgive is to set a captive free and find out that the captive was me.” I know of some people who endured difficulty and found victory, but many years later, someone stirred up their hurt, nurtured their past trial, and helped to create an unforgiving spirit. The tormentors came, and the future was filled with frustration, anger, and a vindictive life. Life did not have to be that way. They had found years of peace and fulfillment; but somehow, the past, like a little spark of a campfire, was rekindled, stirred up, and began to blaze wrath in their soul.
The mercy of God, like the walls of a fortified city, protects us from far more than we realize. Satan has targeted endless evils toward the child of God. God's mercy, as was said in the book of Job, puts a hedge about us. When we fail to forgive, it is as if God opens the gate of protection to the evil outside, and the tormentors find access to our souls.
This access is not granted through the one who hurts us, it is opened when we hurt ourselves by failing to obey God and forgive. We need not go through life bitter, angry, and tormented. Finding rest will require that we forgive.
Pastor